Neighbours- They are vampires (2014)

For those who don’t know who Ramsay Brothers are or rather were; they were the pioneers of horror in Indian cinema and television. They gave us classics ranging from Veerana to Purani Haveli on the big screen and the evergreen Zee Horror Show on the smaller one.  With Neighbours-They are Vampires, Ramsay horror made a comeback after seven long years; their last stint at the silver screen was the 2007 disaster and Aryan Vaid starrer Ghutan. Certainly, Aryan Vaid’s name itself makes people cringe in their seats but nevertheless, he still acts, or rather, tries to. Now, this flick is not precisely the kind of comeback that I would expect from Kamaal Rashid Khan, leave alone the Ramsays; and I’m being very courteous! Gone are the sexy vampires from The Vampire Diaries! This movie, its special effects and its vampires are so depraved that even a sultry B grade movie looks like Jurassic Park! 

The story is about a teenager who is a die-hard horror fan and contemplates that the bungalow close to her house is inhabited by vampires. Moreover, she is a very big fan of a horror novelist played by none other than Shakti Kapoor, our desi womanizer! To start with, there are two antagonists. One is an immoral looking semi-nude vampire lassie and the other is a wannabe clown who tries to make Jim Carrey faces when he slaughters people or licks some ketchup off their decapitated feet and fingers. They clash with the protagonists, some of whom are bitten and transform into evil semi-nude vampires. Beware! Vampire lovers, you might slit your wrists or peel off your skin or put a fire poker in your eyes just to avoid the severe pain that will sear through your brain when you watch this filthy stuff. This is a horrifyingly horrible feature film and my earnest suggestion to Ramsay Bothers is- Quit playing games with my mind!

Don't watch the movie if you love:

1. Vampires 

2. Violence

3. Horror

4. Sanity

5. Yourself

The Key Performance Indicators (KPI's):

1. Story: 1/10

2. Atmosphere: 1/10

3. Sex: 1/10

4. Gore: 2/10

5. Acting: 1/10

Overall rating: 1.2/10    

IMDb rating: 4.6/10

P.S. During an interview, Shyam Ramsay said that he didn't have faith in a star cast because he relied entirely on the Ramsay name for the marketing of this movie. LOL :P

I Saw the Devil (2010)

“An eye for an eye”. Is that what vengeance is all about? Well, you would earnestly doubt that after watching I Saw the Devil. The Koreans are damn good at weaving tales and fables of revenge and I Saw the Devil is by far the best revenge story (apart from Oldboy) to have been spun in recent times. It delves into your mind and tends to expunge the thin lines between the good and the bad, between the antagonist and the protagonist, between the beautiful and the ugly. The hunter and the hunted push each other to such extremes such that the authenticity of the characters seems to blur.

Speaking of the basic plot, it’s a modest revenge story about a highly trained agent seeking revenge from a serial killer who slaughtered his pregnant wife. And you would start musing whether this bare plot warrants 140 minutes of your attention. Aha! It unquestionably does! Because it’s 140 minutes of relentless vengeance and lunacy and for the reason that it tells you to what dissipations does a person go to seek revenge; does he essentially become the person he wants to avenge? Min-sik Choi has essayed the role of the merciless killer with such flamboyance that the pleasure of butchery could be effortlessly perceived from the spark in his eyes. Byung-hun Lee as the ultra-violent agent is charming and yet harsh in his own way.

Watch the movie if you love:

1. Revenge 

2. Very realistic violence

3. Calm pace

4. Serial Killers

5. Min-sik Choi

The Key Performance Indicators (KPI's):

1. Story: 8/10

2. Atmosphere: 10/10

3. Sex: 4/10

4. Gore: 10/10

5. Acting: 10/10

Overall rating: 8.4/10    

IMDb rating: 7.8/10

All in all, this movie is a must watch!

P.S. Please avoid its Bollywood remake- "Ek Villain" at all costs.

Haute Tension aka High Tension aka Switchblade Romance (2003)

Alexandre Aja has created quite a niche market for himself in the horror genre and High Tension, I must say, is his most prolific work as a director till date. Though people might say High Tension fits in the psychological thriller genre, the fact that it has the most “human” and an utterly brutal killer on the loose makes it the most intriguing slasher horror feature film to come out in recent times; not the archetypal teen slasher movie nonetheless!

While the plot is plain and simple, the tension conveyed through the spotless cinematography and lighting grabs the viewer by the throat and strangles him till the twisted end where he chokes on the copious amount of blood that is thrown at him throughout the film. I have never seen a human getting his throat slit with a switchblade, but I insist, if I ever get to see the same happening, it would be unerringly like how it transpired to the poor mother. Also, the enormously criticized ending in my judgment is not only good, but brilliant given the insane twist it delivers to the otherwise very forthright story.  Cecile De France as Marie and Philippe Nahon as the deranged truck driver definitely steal the show!

Watch the movie if you love:

1. Edge of the seat thrills 

2. Very realistic violence

3. Frantic pace

4. Barb Wire Weapons

5. Slashers

The Key Performance Indicators (KPI's):

1. Story: 7/10

2. Atmosphere: 10/10

3. Sex: 1/10

4. Gore: 10/10

5. Acting: 10/10

Overall rating: 7.6/10    

IMDb rating: 6.9/10

All in all, this movie is a must see!

21 Asian Horror Movies that you can't afford to miss!

21. Thirst

Watch out for: A new take on love and vampires and the return of Park Chan Wook

                                                   

                                                    

                                                        20. Bedevilled

              Watch out for:Immaculate detailing of an abused mother's mindset

19. To Sir With Love

Watch out for: Old School Slasher and Revenge horror

18. Cold Fish

Watch out for: Some peculiar characters and a very twisted storyline.

17. 13:Game of Death

Watch out for: A common man's tryst with money and violence

16. Grotesque

Watch out for: Inhumane gore and dismemberment 

15. Suicide Club

Watch out for: The most unbelievable reason to commit suicide

14. Dream Home

Watch out for : Situational and tasteful violence

13. Ichi the killer

Watch out for: The most over the top henchman ever!

12. Three..Extremes

Watch out for: 3 amazing directors coming together

11. The Eye

Watch out for: The entry of Pang brothers in the horror scene 

10. Audition

Watch out for: The wire which can cut meat and bone easily

9. RumaDarah aka Macabre

Watch out for: The most sadistic woman in Indonesian Cinema

8. Alone

Watch out for: Some great atmospheric horror!

7. Batoru Rowaiaru aka Battle Royale

Watch out for: How Hunger Games should have been made

6.  A Tale of Two Sisters

Watch out for: This being a hundred times better than its better known remake

5.  Shutter

Watch out for: The meaning of pain in neck and shoulders.

4. Oldboy

Watch out for: An ending which screws your mind and keeps screwing it

3. Ju On:The grudge

Watch out for: The staircase scene !

2. Ringu 

Watch out for: The deadliest and scariest ghost ever

1. I Saw The Devil

Watch out for: Revenge, Revenge and Revenge!
 

Frontiere(s) (2007)

Directed by Xavier Gens, this little gem was a part of the Afterdark Horrorfest back in 2007. Being an novice but ardent horror lover then, I initially thought of Afterdark Horrorfest films being a very good source of horror movies. Yes, I can dismiss that now! I found this movie while doing some research on the Horrorfest movies and the name struck me. Oh yeah! Not a bad decision at all.

Though I won't say this movie is perfect, but it's very different in its own way. The basic concept is clichéd, something that has always been found in horror movies; a group of friends, a motel, a sadistic family. Nah! Not again! But surprisingly, it's the execution, the special effects and the screenplay that make this movie special. Yes, it is very brutal, almost anti-humane and there's no humor attached to the grisly torture and violence which may make people flinch. The atmosphere is extremely tense and it will grip you so tight that you might end up feeling empathetic for the bunch of thieves whom you might have hated otherwise. Jean-Pierre Jorris as the deranged Nazi patriarch and the head of the sadistic cannibal family is amazing, though I would've liked to see some more of him.

Watch the movie if you love:

1. Thrills 

2. Nazis

3. Torture

4. Blood, blood and more blood!

5. Cannibalism

The Key Performance Indicators (KPI's) :

1. Story: 6/10

2. Atmosphere: 8/10

3. Sex: 3/10

4. Gore: 8/10

5. Acting: 8/10

Overall rating: 6.6/10    

IMDb rating: 6.3/10

All in all, this movie is a must see!